What Makes a King

By Rabbi Moshe Krieger, Yeshivas Bircas HaTorah

In Parshas Vayigash, Yosef reveals his true identity to his brothers, and sends them back to Canaan with specific instructions: “Hurry, go up to my father and say to him… ‘G-d has made me master of all Egypt…'” (Bereishis 45:9).

Why was Yosef so intent on conveying to Yaakov that he had become a ruler in Egypt? Yaakov was surely eager to hear that Yosef was alive and had remained a tzaddik in Egypt, but why should his becoming a king have been so important? And why, years earlier, when Yosef related to his father his dream of becoming a king, does the Torah state that Yaakov “guarded the matter” (ibid. 11), which Rashi explains means that Yaakov awaited this, expecting that Yosef would one day be a king. Why was this important to Yaakov? What value is there in being a king in this transient world? Would Yaakov or Yosef place any importance on wielding power over others?

Rav Chaim Friedlander answers that the sort of kingship that interested Yaakov and Yosef had nothing to do with what gentiles call a “king.” How does one become king in the gentile world? Generally, use of force plays no small role. Is such a person truly a king, or does he hold his position thanks to his army? Moreover, this “king” must be ever wary lest his officers rebel against him. Also, since his rule is based upon power, his subjects rarely appreciate him.

Yosef, by contrast, was a true king, whose rule began by ruling over himself (see Bereishis Rabba 90:3). “Ruling over oneself” means not letting one’s desires influence his thoughts or deeds. The only factor that motivates such a person is Hashem’s will. A person who masters his body entirely and acts only out of Hashem’s honor can truly be called a king. When a person reaches the level of being a king over himself, Hashem will spread this power and make him king over others, too. Such a king is not concerned about potential rebellions, either. His subjects recognize that he acts with utter righteousness – to himself and others – and therefore appreciate and respect him.

For example, when Pharaoh met Yosef, he was so impressed with him that he appointed him ruler over his country! Pharaoh reserved only the nominal title of king for himself, but reign of Egypt was now in Yosef’s hands! This astonishing fact bothered many of the mefarshim: As talented as Yosef was as a dream interpreter, when he concluded that Pharaoh should find a man to oversee the storage of crops during the seven years of plenty, shouldn’t Pharaoh have given this task to one of his leading ministers? Why give it to an unknown Hebrew slave who came to him straight from prison? Clearly, Pharaoh saw in Yosef the qualities of a leader, as he himself exclaimed to his advisors: “Could we find another like him — a man in whom is the spirit of G-d?” (ibid. 41:38).

This sort of kingship, in which one rules first over himself, and then Hashem spreads this power to others, was what Yosef dreamed about and what Yaakov anticipated for him.

In fact, Harav Yosef Yehuda Leib Bloch notes that when Yosef told his brothers his dream of becoming king, he never intended to arouse their jealousy. Rather, he was rebuking them, saying: “I am going to become king, and the main part of being a king is to be king over myself. You should do that, too!”

The Kusari (3) states that every Jew should strive to be a king over himself, and not simply to go through life letting his desires lead him. Such a Jew is not serving Hashem properly.

Many of us think that we are in control of themselves, but when it comes to a nisayon, we don’t realize how much leeway we give ourselves. We know that it is wrong to get angry, and usually we keep our anger in control, but in particularly trying situations, we feel justified in letting our anger loose.

Alternately, a person may be upstanding in money matters, but if he feels he is in a rough situation, he becomes willing to cut corners, even though he knows deep down that what he is doing is not 100 per cent honest.

Another person may be very careful about not speaking Lashon hara, but if he feels his own self-respect is at stake, he’ll say whatever he deems necessary. These and myriad examples present themselves to us as possibilities where we should try to take full control of our behavior. One who masters this has tapped into the level called kingship.

Rav Aharon Yehuda Leib Steinman was a king over himself. Even in matters that seem to us perfectly permissible — if he felt that it contained some element that went slightly against Hashem’s will, he would have no part in it.

Once, Rav Steinman’s yeshiva was late in paying his full salary by several months. When the treasurer had finally assembled a sum to cover the past months, he gave it to Rav Steinman, who looked confused as the money was placed on the table before him.

“What is this for?” he asked.

“This is your back pay, for the past several months,” explained the treasurer.

“Back pay? The yeshiva doesn’t owe me any back pay,” he said as he pushed the money away.

“Of course you’re owed this money,” insisted the treasurer. “For the past several months, we’ve only paid you 20 percent of your salary.”

“Somehow, I managed without this money. If I didn’t need it, I feel I have no right to accept it.”

May we be zoche to become kings over ourselves!