פרשת בהעלותך
In this week’s parsha, we learn about how the Jewish people left Har Sinai. The Ramban cites a midrash that says that when the Jewish people left, they left the way a kid does when school is over. He runs out! So according to this midrash, it would seem that you had 600,000 grown men running away from a mountain. But what’s difficult about this midrash is that there’s no reference whatsoever in the pasookim to the Jews ever doing such a thing. In fact, the Chumash even seems to imply the opposite, saying that “they travelled according to G-d’s word” – meaning, in the orderly way in which G-d commanded. What made Hazal think that Clal Yisrael did such a childish act?
The Saba of Slovodka answers this difficulty in a shocking way. He says that there is no overt reference to this event anywhere in the Chumash because indeed, it never happened! However, the collective attitude of the Jewish people at the time was that they looked forward to being “liberated” from the mitzvos. Even though it seems that the Jewish people did nothing wrong actively, there was still something lurking beneath the surface. On a certain level they didn’t really appreciate receiving the mitzvos and had some negative feelings towards them. Sometimes we can do everything right, but still lack the proper outlook. Hazal, by teaching us this midrash, are trying to awaken us to the truth that such an attitude can easily trip up anyone, even the Jews who received the Torah at Sinai! All the more so, we have to be on guard and daven that we merit to become Jews who look at the world the way we should. When we start to look at kashrus as a burden, Pesach cleaning as painful, and (for those of us in full-time learning) to look at the clock longing for the seder to end, we should realize that we are becoming the very Jews we don’t want to become! In truth, we want to be inspired Jews who constantly strive to do more and more mitzvos. This midrash is warning us of this trap.
Obviously, all of us can appreciate that it’s not ideal to look at avodas Hashem as a burden. However, looking to be “liberated” from Hashem’s service can lead to even more severe things. Rav Moshe Schwab, the Mashgiach of Gateshead, points out that the next parshiyos talk about how the Jewish people complained about their situation in the desert. Some of the people even cried out, regretting that they’d ever left Egypt! Explains Rav Schwab, these issues don’t develop on their own. Rather, when the Jews first left Sinai and experienced a feeling of “relief” from receiving the Torah, they had already planted the seeds that would later lead to dissension with Hashem Himself. It’s a difficult message to hear, but not being excited about Torah today can mean being off the derech tomorrow. Rav Moshe Feinstein once said that the most destructive phrase a parent can say in front of his child is “It’s hard to be a Yid.” When we don’t view our service of Hashem as the excitement of our lives and make it our complete center of focus, whether we like it or not, we are giving a message to ourselves and to everyone around us that we really don’t value having a relationship with Hashem and don’t care too much about the Torah that He gave us. And if Hashem is depicted as a merciless taskmaster or a stickler who just doesn’t want us to have fun, antagonism towards Torah and mitzvos is inevitable.
There is a famous gemara in Avoda Zara 3a that chronicles a dialogue between Hashem and all the non-Jews. The non-Jews argue that they should get the same reward as the Jews and have a place in the World to Come. “Give us the Torah and we’ll do it,” they say. G-d gives them a small test. If they can just keep the mitzvah of sukkah, they can earn their place in the World to Come. So everyone goes out to make a sukkah and everything seems to be going fine, until high noon. Suddenly, the sun is beating down on them and it is no longer a pleasant experience to dwell in the sukkah. So everyone leaves their sukkah, upset, kicking it on their way out. With this, the gemara says, they fail their test. Even though the halacha is that when one is pained by staying in the sukkah he is exempt from the mitzvah, nevertheless the non-Jews fail their test by doing something unwarranted – they didn’t have to kick the sukkah on their way out! However, we can still ask on this gemara – how is this fair at all? Just because they kick the sukkah on their way out, they lose everything? They do want to do the mitzvos! Just give them another mitzvah and they’ll do it!!!
The Michtav Me’Eliyahu answers that when the non-Jews kick the sukkah, they are really showing that they don’t belong in Olam Haba. Olam Haba, the Mesilas Yesharim says, is a place where closeness to Hashem – through the performance of mitzvahs in this world – comes to a climax, where one is able to cling to G-d completely. By leaving the sukkah when the mitzvah became hard, and kicking it on the way out, the non-Jews showed that they weren’t doing the mitzvah for the sake of achieving closeness to Hashem; rather, it was out of total selfishness. They wanted reward. For this, they can never connect to Olam Haba, where the entire essence is closeness to G-d. Jews, on the other hand, understand the great value of mitzvahs.
A mitzvah is a golden opportunity to get close to G-d. The midrash in Bamidbar 17 says a person should view a mitzvah as if he’s drowning in the sea, and somebody throws him a rope which pulls him up to the boat. In other words, in the physical world, the only way we can become pulled out of our massively confusing existence is to hang on with all our strength to G-d’s rope: His mitzvos. Each mitzvah deepens our relationship with our Creator. When one thinks this way, every mitzvah is precious. And any challenge that comes to us in its observance will be viewed as a privilege and opportunity. By striving to overcome challenges in keeping the mitzvos, we are demonstrating to our Creator our deep love for Him.
There is a story of Reb Aharon of Karlin giving his Hassidim mussar. Even though they may have been keeping the halacha correctly, Reb Aharon wanted to make it very clear that this is not all G-d wants. “There’s a big difference between the way you make a bracha and the way I make a bracha,” he said. “When you feel hungry and have the urge to eat, it happens to be that the halacha is you need to make a bracha. Only then can you eat. And that’s the reason you make a bracha. However, when I see an apple, I just want to bless Hashem for making such a wonderful creation. The problem is that I can only say a bracha if I eat the apple. So that’s why I eat!” This is the level Reb Aharon tried to inspire his students to reach. We should also strive to have this message penetrate our hearts, and we should do our mitzvahs solely for the sake of getting closer to G-d.
May we all be zoche to relish the preciousness of every mitzvah!!!